3 Things Families Can Do To Make Daily Life With Dementia Feel Calmer
Living with dementia can sometimes make everyday life feel confusing, frustrating or overwhelming. Changes in memory, communication and familiar routines can make it harder to understand what is happening, while situations that once felt simple can suddenly require more effort. This can affect how a person feels throughout the day and may sometimes lead to anxiety, frustration or distress.
There are small things families and care partners can do to help create a greater sense of familiarity, comfort and control. This Alzheimer's Month, we spoke to our Filo Family Support team about some simple ways to make daily life feel calmer for the person living with dementia – and for those around them. Here’s what they shared…
Acceptance
Living with dementia can mean that a person has to make changes to the way they live day to day, to the way they communicate with others and to the relationships they have with friends and family. It can be very easy to focus on the things that they are no longer able to do or to become isolated and cut off from others. Helping them to accept these changes can make life easier and more comfortable.
It is important to help a loved one living with dementia to stay positive, encouraging them to accept that they may have to do things in different ways and to focus on what they can do. Keeping busy and doing things they enjoy, rather than dwelling on things that they are unable to manage, may help them to feel more fulfilled and content.
For a person living with dementia, accepting that they may need more help from others can be frustrating. Encouraging them to talk about what help they need and the best way to provide this can make them feel more in control of this. It can be particularly challenging when a partner, child or parent takes over the role of ‘carer’, as this can change their relationship. Allow them to share their feelings about this and give them time to accept that this change is needed.
Regular Routines
Having regular routines to follow each week can help an individual living with dementia to feel calmer and more grounded. It can be easier and reassuring to do things at a similar time each day and in the same order. If they are more settled at certain times of day this may be the best time to undertake activities, for example going for a walk after breakfast each morning.
Simplifying routines, keeping tasks straightforward and avoiding sudden changes in routine can help to make things calmer and more manageable. Breaking down tasks into smaller steps can make them easier to complete and having everything out that is needed, such as all of the ingredients for preparing a meal can help them to focus on the task in hand.
Reducing distractions, like background noise or the TV; giving the person plenty of time and going at a slower pace can all aid focus and concentration.
A notebook, large ‘week to view’ diary or wall calendar can help with remembering what is happening each day
Using Music Through the Day
Music can reach the parts of the brain that other forms of communication cannot. It can bring back memories, improve our mood and help us to connect with others.
Many people living with dementia enjoy being part of a local music or singing group, but you don’t have to join a group to enjoy music together. Try singing a favourite song to encourage the person to join in or putting on a favourite track to dance or move to. Play music that has personal meaning, such as a favourite holiday song or a theme from a much loved film. Maybe the music will bring back memories to share.
As well as slowing our heart rate, music can also lighten the mood. Try some gentle singing or music during less enjoyable tasks, such as personal care or doing the cleaning.
Our Filo Family Support team offers regular, confidential support to the families and care partners of our clients. Their conversations cover a wide range of topics - from adapting to change and coping with a sense of loss, to navigating feelings of loneliness or isolation and managing changes in behaviour.
