Care Works Both Ways: Brief Reflections by Liz Dennis

Liz Dennis, Co-founder and Director of The Filo Project

The Filo Project is a ‘care provider’, but it’s interesting to ponder just what that phrase means and whether it fully captures the nature of the relationships we see every day. The boundaries between giving and receiving care can become beautifully blurred, revealing a more mutual, human exchange than the phrase might suggest.

Recently, a new member of our communications team went to visit a group and was struck by the care one member of the group took to look after her. It was a cold day, and the client (M) was concerned that our staff member (A) was warm enough, and she insisted that A sit next to the radiator. M then also made sure that A's coat wasn’t getting too hot against the radiator. Such a level of care led A to describe being put at ease straight away by M, 'which is exactly what you’d hope for from anyone joining a new group.’

Carrying on this theme, one host gave her perspective of the role, saying, "Before starting hosting, I thought it would be about ‘me giving to them’ but now it’s more about what they give back to me. I also love the way clients care for each other. How they support each other and maybe stroke each other’s hands if they are low. At one time, I had a client with very dry skin on her hands, and another of the clients in the group would always ask me if I had any hand cream, and she would massage the cream into the other client’s hands."

In meetings we always talk about it being ‘a day out with friends’ for our clients but ‘it’s a day out with my friends too.’

We have received many testimonials over the years which describe how The Filo Project supports our clients to live better with dementia through the forging of new relationships within our groups.

I love how these examples show people with dementia helping our staff to live well or better without dementia. Care can work both ways. People with dementia remain parents, grandparents, relatives and friends, and a lifetime habit of caring doesn’t disappear with a diagnosis.

By Liz Dennis